Do you find your motivation waning during your weight loss journey? Do you need a reliable source of support to lean on when things get tough?
Motivation often comes in waves. Many people begin their weight loss journey riding the crest of a motivational high. At this point, we’re filled with energy and determination, making grand plans for what we should and must do, expecting our motivation to carry us through.
However, motivation is unpredictable. We don’t know exactly why it appears or when it might disappear. If you rely solely on motivation to keep you going and make the necessary changes, you risk disappointment. Motivation can help you build momentum, but it’s not enough to sustain you over the long haul.
That’s why it’s essential to create strategies, systems, and routines to keep you on track, even when your motivation falters. In this article, we delve into why you shouldn’t rely solely on motivation for behavioural change and provide you with five practical tips for what to do instead.
Why you can't rely on motivation
Before we explore why motivation can be unreliable, let’s first answer the question:
What is motivation?
Motivation drives our actions and the goals we pursue. Broadly speaking, there are two types of motivation:
- Extrinsic motivation comes from external sources, such as recognition from others, rewards, or fitting into a particular dress or pair of trousers.
- Intrinsic motivation, on the other hand, stems from our own values and interests, and this type of motivation is often the most enduring.
In a weight loss journey, we are often guided by extrinsic motivation. This might involve striving for visible results, such as a change in weight or better-fitting clothes. The issue is that extrinsic motivation requires constant renewal to confirm that what we’re doing is working. We can become reliant on these small victories to sustain our behaviour, but what happens when we reach our goal?
When the goal is achieved, the motivation can vanish because we no longer feel the behaviour is providing value—the reward is gone.
Create a lasting identity change
While goals can help set the direction, they are rarely enough to establish the long-term systems and habits needed to sustain change. Lasting change requires us to examine the patterns and beliefs we carry with us. Many people who successfully maintain their weight loss often describe a change in identity—weight loss is no longer just a goal but part of who they have become through consistent actions.
To achieve lasting success, we need to build a foundation that goes deeper than motivation and goals alone. Here are five actionable tips to help you establish this strong, sustainable base:
1. Goals are good, but fall in love with the process
We are excellent at setting goals, such as running a certain distance or reaching a specific weight. However, to avoid falling into the trap of using behaviour solely as a means to an end, it’s more important to focus on the process or system that will take you there. What does it take to run a marathon or lose significant weight? What kind of person achieves these things? Who do you need to become?
In behavioural literature, it’s often said that the goal isn’t to run a marathon but to become a runner.
Similarly, if the goal isn’t to lose 10 kilos, perhaps the aim is to become compassionate towards yourself and your body or to be mindful and present when it comes to food and social situations.
What small steps can you take to become the person you aspire to be?
Our behaviour can be thought of as “votes” for the person we are. They shape the image of what we can achieve and what we value. Each time we choose one behaviour over another, we reinforce a certain identity. For instance, staying home instead of exercising may gradually build the narrative that we are “lazy.”
Likewise, every time you prioritise work over your weight loss (or family, for that matter), you cast a vote for being a diligent, hardworking employee—a reward that holds more value to you than “being healthy” or present with your family.
Our behaviour shapes who we are, and who we are shapes our behaviour.
To succeed with long-term behavioural change, we must alter our identity and self-perception. This happens by focusing on small behaviours. The smaller the action, the easier it is to reinforce consistently. Fall in love with the process and find joy in the little things each day.
2. Start even when motivation is low
It’s tempting to delay change until Monday, next month, January, or when “things calm down.” All these delays indicate a lack of high motivation, which is understandable. New behaviours require a lot of mental energy initially. However, they also demand a sensible approach. Knowing why and when we perform a behaviour makes it easier to return to it after setbacks or to change a bad habit.
But when motivation is low, starting a new behaviour can be a good idea.
Ask yourself: What can I do when motivation is lacking? What is the smallest effort/change/action I can take to move towards becoming the person I want to be? Successfully implementing a behavioural change during a challenging period (e.g., a busy time at work) makes it far more likely that you’ll stick with it when things are easier. The reverse, however, is often not true.
3. Make it attractive and visible
Consider how you can make your desired behaviour more visible, appealing, and easier to incorporate into your daily life.
Focus on small, achievable daily actions. For instance, if you want to drink more water or snack less, try removing unhealthy snacks from your environment, placing your water bottle on your desk, or putting your gym bag by the door so you’re ready to exercise in the afternoon.
If you can improve by 1% each day, you’re on the right track. Instead of jumping headfirst into behavioural change, consider working with a coach who can provide concrete strategies and help structure your progress to keep the new behaviour top of mind.
4. Find your underlying motivation
Be clear about the driving force behind the changes you want to make and the life you want to lead. Instead of thinking, “I’ll do X once I’ve lost the weight,” ask yourself what you’re holding back from doing right now. Why do you want to lose weight?
For example, the goal of weight loss might be to gain more confidence, energy, or balance in life.
But what will you do with that confidence, energy, or balance once you have it? What meaningful actions can you take now? What’s holding you back? Why?
What is the deeper quality behind your desire for weight loss? If it’s for health, why is health important to you? If it’s to play with your children, why does that matter to you? The more specific you can be, the easier it is to stay committed. If your behaviour is merely a means to an end, it’s challenging to sustain it for “health’s sake.”
5. Are you willing to let go of your current behaviours?
Why do we often become impatient during our weight loss journey?
Impatience due to a lack of results often indicates that the current behaviour feels meaningless—the reward is missing.
Reflect on how your current behaviours align with your goals. For instance, if your weight loss journey involves removing sugary treats from family time at weekends, how does this affect your relationship with your family? Would it still feel as enjoyable without the treats? How important is that quality time to you?
Consider whether your dream weight is worth giving up certain meaningful situations. For some, achieving their weight loss goals might even require a change of job, as the demands of being a dedicated employee might conflict with weight loss goals.
Summary
As we’ve discussed, relying solely on motivation is a poor strategy. Motivation fluctuates, often beyond our control. The more aware you are of your behaviour and the meaning behind it, the easier it becomes to sustain when motivation dips—and it will. By employing concrete habit strategies, creating an attractive environment, and aligning your behaviour with your identity, you can create changes that last.
References
https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4899-2271-7
Clear, J. (2017). Atomic Habits.
Harris, R. (2023). Happiness Trap, 2nd edition. Robinson.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33455563/